Jeff: It's not idiot proof.

Mr. Dog Poop: It is not idiot proof.

Jeff: I mean, it is not idiot proof, is it really functional? 

Mr. Dog Poop: So this one also has a little pea cup or whatever that is, and it says, poached an omelet again.

 Jeff: Wait, am I being drug tested? I didn't consent to a drug test.

Mr. Dog Poop: You didn't consent to it?

Jeff: No, I did not. I will test positive for several drugs. I won't tell you which one.

Mr. Dog Poop: Do I need to get HR in here and go back over your man contract?

Jeff: I feel like if I don't pull my dick out on camera, I'm okay. Wasn't that the contract?

Mr. Dog Poop: Yeah. I feel like that's probably enough. But I don't think HR is going to agree. So I guess both of these do egg poaching. Is this an egg poacher? 

Jeff: It says right here exceed your expectations.

Mr. Dog Poop: Exceed your expectations.

Jeff: I hate those kind of puns.

Mr. Dog Poop: And those are terrible puns. So this has a little tray here. So this has a tray Jeff, the big one has a tray for poached eggs and hard boiled eggs. Oh, no poached. I guess they're poached because they're steamed, but they're just cooked. And then this thing goes on here.

Jeff: Crack the egg in here and it'll poach.

Mr. Dog Poop: So I guess we need to get these are, they have little buttons on them.

Jeff: Well, what did this drug testing all about? 

Mr. Dog Poop: I mean, it really looks like something you should pee in and then pour out, right? But should we poach the eggs on beer?

Jeff: Maybe, oh, you know what it does say you're not going to see this on the camera. It does say poached an omelet on this side.

Mr. Dog Poop: It makes an omelet. So this thing makes an omelet.

Jeff: How does it make an omelet?

Mr. Dog Poop: I thought it made hard boiled eggs and poached eggs, but it makes an omelet.

Jeff: How does it make an omelet?

Mr. Dog Poop: Jeff! Stupid moron Jeff, you just fill it up to the omelet level and then it makes an omelet.

Jeff: Do I have to add like, peppers and bacon and anything else I want? It just makes it automatically. 

Mr. Dog Poop: It just turns it into an omelet.

Jeff: Oh, can I comment real quick on this big one right here? Look at how long this cord is. 

Mr. Dog Poop: Oh, that's pretty short. 

Jeff: It's barely longer than my forehead. 

Mr. Dog Poop: Which one is that? Is that the big one? Yeah, the big one. 

Jeff: That's a big one, oh my God. Look at the width of this. I do have a seven inch head. But it's not that big that the cord should be almost as big as like an head.

Mr. Dog Poop: So each one of these is supposed to take seven eggs. Jeff, did you have enough in your budget to buy seven eggs?

Jeff: I got a dozen because I spent all weekend at the sperm bank. They pay about 350 per load.

Mr. Dog Poop: That's a lot of work to buy a dozen eggs cost. What does a dozen eggs cost now? $12, $14 for a dozen eggs.

Jeff: Four ejaculations.

Mr. Dog Poop: We got the professional white eggs from American chickens. These eggs look bad. Are we just supposed to hit the button and pour omelet into it?

Jeff: I assume you're supposed to crack the egg.

Mr. Dog Poop: I feel like we're both going to get burned again today. Both going to get burned.

Jeff: Well, good thing I've got my oven mits.

Mr. Dog Poop: You got your oven mits still. Don't ever get rid of those.

Jeff: They're staying in here forever. I learned my lesson. These ovens mits will be here forever.

Mr. Dog Poop: They're going to plug in. This cord is ridiculous. What the hell are you going to do with this cord?

Jeff: Oh, I don't know. The small one needs to like, sneak in, it's not going to be able to be on camera on my end.

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