Mr. Dog Poop: Tiger Woods was going like 275 miles an hour. Right?

Jeff: Yeah. And I think he was sober.

Mr. Dog Poop: He was on pain medication, so he was sober drinking, but he was taking opioids or fentanyl or whatever.

Jeff: So, I'm pretty sure he takes those.

Mr. Dog Poop: I'm whatever he was, whatever he was taking. He got a few DUIs, driving under the influence, DUI, for like driving golf carts and driving in his neighborhood.

Jeff: He got one when his wife attacked him with a golf club. Because he got in the car, he was drunk, he got in the car and tried to drive away and hit a tree, I think.

Mr. Dog Poop: Hit a stop sign.

Jeff: Yeah. He should keep his driving to the golf course. Not off. He's rich enough to hire a driver.

Mr. Dog Poop: He can afford to hire a driver. He shouldn't have this problem. He should definitely be able to hire a driver. So, here's some news, it's not as disturbing as the General Lee, but it's going to be disturbing to you. Maybe you already know it. You just don't care. Tennessee residents complain Jack Daniels is polluting the community with whiskey fungus. Now if you don't know what whiskey fungus is, here's an Ohio State University, the Ohio State University report, It's huge. It has pictures of whiskey fungus and explanations how apparently, these whiskey plants are. You can see it on the building here. Ethanol fueled fungus as whiskey fungus thrive for centuries around distilleries and bakeries. It's been a source of complaints from residents who live near Kentucky Bourbon distilleries, Canadian whiskey makers and Caribbean rum manufacturers. It's a known thing. It's destroying towns, it's covering trees.

Jeff: Why can't I get it all my pizza?

Mr. Dog Poop: I actually read an article today about whether you could eat whiskey fungus and they said that they hadn't found anything that said it was dangerous to eat. So, I don't know about that.

Jeff: I'm going on a road trip.

Mr. Dog Poop: I don’t know if you can eat it.

Jeff: You get whiskey fungus for free, or do you have to pay?

Mr. Dog Poop: I mean, the leaves are encrusted when this fungus; everything's covered with the whiskey fungus from these plants. So apparently, Jack Daniels is getting shut down.

Jeff: I had a girl who dumped me who told me I was covering in whiskey fungus too. So, I'm not fazed by the story at all.

Mr. Dog Poop: Yeah, but if they're closing plants because of whiskey fungus, there's going to be whiskey shortage.

Jeff: Closing distilleries because of it?

Mr. Dog Poop: Yeah. They're closing distilleries, so there's going to be a shortage.

Jeff: Fuck them tress, I need my whiskey,

Mr. Dog Poop: Huh?

Jeff: Fuck them trees, I need my whiskey.

Mr. Dog Poop: Right. So, there's going to be a huge shortage because if you take 25% of the distilleries offline, where are you going to?

Jeff: We cannot allow that to happen. Biden, now is the time.

Mr. Dog Poop: The only place they're going to allow whiskey to be made is going to be China. So, you're going to have China. So, you’re going to have China whiskey.

Jeff: No.

Mr. Dog Poop: China whiskey, Jeff. That's all that's going to be left for you, China whiskey.

Jeff: It's going to come with COVID germs, and I don't know.

Mr. Dog Poop: You don't believe in COVID.

Jeff: Mushrooms, they're fungus. I want a pizza with whiskey fungus on it. Get drunk while I eat my pizza.

Mr. Dog Poop: Order it from Tennessee and get an Uber Eat from Tennessee and you'll get whiskey fungus.

Jeff: There you go. Do you think Uber Eats delivers that far?

Mr. Dog Poop: If you got the money, got your Man Show millions, you can get it. It's going to be cold.

Jeff: Jay Frog says Mr. Dog Poop. Little known fact, Jeff doesn't actually have a beard. That is whiskey fungus.

Mr. Dog Poop: It’s whiskey fungus.

Jeff: I'm actually bald also.

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